After the concert...

Hi readers... Well, My Lady and I return from a wonderful evening in Downtown Minneapolis, at First Ave, seeing Beth Orton.

The concert was really fun. And Beth sang very well, after the first few songs. She didn't warm up, obviously, and for the first two songs, I was actually a bit worried that Beth Orton was going to turn into one of those "recording artists" that really shouldn't be heard outside of the CD in your stereo... You know, the singer that needs a heckuva lot a post-production... Luckily... Beth's voice warmed up, and she proceeded to give the audience a wonderful show. She brought a full band with her, and the lead-guitarist/back-up vocalist guy was perhaps the most gifted kid I've seen! I'm not kidding... I LOVE Beth, but there were times I found myself looking and listening to her guitarist. That's never happened before. Anyway... Beth, of course, has a new album, of which I have only heard a bit. (Being poor, I have not yet purchased it) And she spent most of the evening singing songs that I didn't actually know. That did not detract from my enjoyment, as the music on her new album, judging from her performance, proves to be a wonderful collection. Beth, also of course, spent a bit of time singing a few of her "oldies" to assuage her fan-base. Her acoustic version of "Central Reservation" was beautiful, sung after her band had left the stage to allow her the "intimacy" of her audience. Her final two songs (2nd encore) were also wonderful, spiritually moving renditions. Fiona and I were rapt (as were most of the audience) as she concluded this amazing evening. All in all... I have to give this concert a B+ and consider myself lucky that My Lady decided to treat me, by buying us tickets to a singer whom I have followed basically since her back-up days to the Chemical Bros.

Unfortunately... This is where the evening turned to poo.

I've complained about this issue before. However... Last night, was the FIRST night that I saw this problem actually effect my enjoyment of the evening.

What is this issue?

The Minneapolis Smoking Ban (MSB).

I, like MANY other folk living in the Twin Cities have had to get used to the fact that my formerly "smoky" clubs and bars have become "non-smoking" and frankly rather stinky. Yes... Stinky. The cigarette smoke did a lot to cover up the fact that certain venues are old, and reek of body-odour, spilled and rotting food and alcohol. However... The up-shot of the MSB has been that you go home AFTER the club, and you don't reek of smoke. Frankly... The "other" odours do not tend to stick to you unlike the miasma of cigarette smoke. So... Fine. The MSB is a good thing that way.

As a smoker... I don't really like the smoking ban. However, I understand the health-reasons, and although I don't buy most of them... I'll let it go, and join with the rest of my little "smoking society" and step out the front/back door to have a smoke. This is something that I can deal with, and have very little issues dealing with, as long as it isn't winter. In winter... The MSB truly sucks. Moving onward...

Although I'm sure there are health benefits to the MSB... And surely the Health Insurance companies that bought and paid for the politicians that banned smoking in Minneapolis and elsewhere are happy... I discovered an effect that I don't think the general population realises...

What is this effect?

Well... It the one that the owners and staff of Bars and Clubs had mentioned before the ban went into effect in an effort to resist this MSB...

Money.

That's right... You see... The bloody politicians and "insurance money-lenders" kept saying that if you "Cut out smoking... Non-smokers will come back out, and you will not lose any money over the long term..." Blah, blah FUCKING blah....

You know what... What all the bar-owners and most of us smoking customers already KNEW was that this is complete bullshit.

I'll just stick with what I've observed, okay... Just to be fair here... Only what I have observed.

When restaurants were still "Do you want smoking, or non?" every time you walked into the place... I'd sit in smoking... And observe the non-smoking section. See... Smokers stick around a bit. We have a few fags before the meal... Get some coffee, and stick around a bit AFTER the meal smoking. Well... Non-smoking basically was an assembly-line of feeding... Get 'em in, get 'em fed, and get 'em the fuck out. Restaurants, who's entire profit is based on getting as many tables filled and moved on, and RE-filled were the basis that the "politicians" used as an example of "how the smoking ban will work" without realising the difference between a place for people to EAT and a place for people to socialise and DRINK.

See... Bars don't work as restaurants do... The purpose of a bar is to give a person a place to sit or stand, and BUY ALCOHOL AND CONSUME SAID ALCOHOL IN AS GREAT AN AMOUNT AS POSSIBLE.

You see... You don't buy "a beer" and then leave... Allowing another person to come in and sit at your former place and buy "a beer" and then leave allowing for another person to come in and...

You get the point.

No... If you're a bar owner you want people to come in, stay in, and drink in for as long as possible. That's your profit.

That's why the smoking ban is hurting the bar and club business... Here again is my own observation from last night...

We arrived at the club... early. Still all of the tables that were still open were "reserved" so... We sat on a "half-wall" thing that is next to the dance-floor and frankly were only about five metres from Beth... But I digress... Anyhoo... We're sitting there, ordering beers, going out occasionally to smoke a butt... And all is fine.

The opener goes on. (Good band called um... Shite, can't remember.) Anyhoo... They go on, get off... We have a few more brews... Beth comes on... Plays for a good amount of time (we're getting beer thought due to a great waitress) and eventually Beth finishes.

I say to My Lady... Let's go out and have a fag, and we'll stick around for a few more beers...

You see... In the "older days" one would stay for the AFTER band party and have a few more drinks...

Oh... BUT NO... My Lady and I go out the front door... And the bouncer says "thanks for coming" and I say... "You're welcome, but we're just having a smoke, we'll be back." and he in turn says... "No you're not, we're closed now."

"We're closed now."

"We're CLOSED NOW?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?"

What the?

It's barely 11:00pm... (Bars in Minneapolis are allowed to be open till 1:00am)

First Ave ALWAYS used to have a pretty fun scene AFTER a band had finished...

I used to LOVE sitting there at the bar watching the dancing and occasionally joining in if a particularly good song came on... But...

"We're closed now!"

To say that I was shocked and appalled can only be an understatement. A severe one, at that...

Well... There's other bars. Glueks... Closed. Kieran's Closed. All the pubs in the area...

CLOSED at 11:00 P-fucking-M on a Monday... CLOSED.

For readers from a different place... Imagine your pubs/bars closing two hours before they're meant to.

In Britain... You're out at the pub, and at 9:00pm the bar staff rings last orders...

That's what it was like.

I mean... What the?

Kieran's has "pub hours" on the doors.... It's meant to be open till 1:00am Monday through Thursday and 2:00am on Fri and Sat. That's the posted hours...

But they were closed and shuttered at 11:00pm.

That's fucking sad.

The entire Downtown Area was closing up shop.

Now... I haven't been here for a while... And My Lady and I are only NOW just starting to get back into our social lives here... But...

That just shocked me.

I'm pissed off.

And it's all Due to the fucking smoking ban!!!

Without smokers "sticking around" and drinking... The bars and clubs now close...

It's a very frightening effect of this so-called "health" crap.

Gah.

Folks... Non-smokers are a scourge to all social-life and enjoyment. And they're making sure that we do NOT enjoy our lives anymore and that we become like them... Robots and drones to a sad/boring/shite life.

To hell with all of you politicians with your pockets lined by insurance companies... To hell with all of the rest of you health-nazis too.

-- Tuckmac